I Hate Drew Barrymore

In an interview I read with the Strokes, drummer Fab Moretti said of his girlfriend Drew Barrymore "She's so beautiful, she must have the gardens of Babylon inside of her."

Maybe these songs don't have the gardens of Babylon inside of them. But I still love them.

The Cocteau Twins - Heaven or Las Vegas - I must have heard this song about ten billion times now and I can't understand a single thing they're saying, apart from the 'heaven or las vegas' part. The vocals are amazing though, like some weird combination of Kim Deal and Bjork. The rest of it's kinda hazy-synthy-Cure-ish and lush.

Sergio Mendes - Magalenha - songs like this make we want to make a movie. This song would be perfect for some kind of chase, where two people look at each other, and one of them just breaks out into this thousand mile an hour run and the other one follows. It's got this great primal kind of South American beat that kicks in after a few seconds and this incrediably bouncy energy.

The Sounds - Ego - I fell in love with this synthy polished little group of Ramones knock offs from Sweeden when their first album came out a few years ago. I thought they were dead, then I heard this song. The magical new wave dancing Swedes are back again with this cute little track. Singer Maja Iverrson puts in her extra punky two cents with lots of growled 'fuck you's.

Liars - A Visit From Mr. Drum - Brooklyn noise punks (i think) Liars dropped a lovely new Animal Collective knock off of a record. Some of the songs I've heard are unlistenable, and most tracks that go for this sort of nuanced thing are just horrendously annoying. This one is just gorgeous.

Prince - Black Sweat -I love Prince! I like his old stuff best though, and thought he'd be better off leaving it be after 1999 and Purple Rain, or really any time before he was 'the artist formerly known as Prince'. This is song is supersonic though, and reminds me of that band Hot Chip. It sounds, tastes and feels like hip hop, but those stupid sqeauling vocals make it... i don't know. Funky. Weird. I even coughed up the 99 cents to pay for this one on iTunes because I couldn't find it online.

Gang of Four - Call Me Up - It's impossible to read a review of some cool new band without hearing a stupid Gang of Four reference. It's true though. Take any Gang of Four song, switch the singer, and suddenly you've got a song that's ten times more relevent than anything by the Arctic Monkeys. I never really liked Gang of Four, but I love this song. It's got this fanstastic pulsing chorus. It's like the best Bloc Party song ever.

Johnathan Richman and the Modern Lovers - I'm Straight - The whole thing is great. Over this slouchy little Violent Femmes sounding song, this guy is asking "Why are we stoned like Hippie Johnnies? I'm straight!" all while sounding slightly stoned himself.

The Management - Kids - I have absolutely no idea where I downloaded this song from. I'm obsessed with it though. There's this fluctuating synthy bass line throughout the song that gets overlapped by this sparkly space sounding keyboard. Then there's this break where the song stops and all you hear are these screaming little kids. It's so random, I love it.

Goldfrapp - Ride a White Horse - another gothy gorgeous dancy pop song from superhero Alison Goldfrapp. The tick tock beat and icy vocals keep it from being boring.

The Knife - Heartbeats - This song is so bizarre. There's steel drum samples, almost reggae sounding spliced beats, and lyrics about promises, wolf teeth, and devils. The whole thing is syrupy and completely weird. My favorite thing about it is the vocals. It's what Kelly Clarkson would sound like if she grew up in a cave in Iceland and only listened Kraftwerk records.

Destroyer - 3000 Flowers - Destroyer's like a combination of Neutral Milk Hotel and the Fiery furnaces. There's lots of little odd, musical non sequitors that somehow come together and make it gorgeously cohesive.

Captain Beefheart - Her Eyes are a Blue Million Miles - This is on the soundtrack the the Big Lebowski, and it belongs there. The song is like the movie. It sounds normal enough, but then it suddenly hits you with a big dose of what-the-fuck, and in the end, you think it was kinda cool, but you wouldn't want it to happen to you.

Oh and this http://www.superalright.com/Tired_of_Being_Sexy.mp3. Some random but totally genius short dj set of the most danceable sugar high songs this side of Funkytown. Out Hud! That new Sounds song I love! Kylie Minogue! The only thing that keeps it from being perfect is that clunker of a Chromeo song Needy Girl about 3/4 through. That and the fact that I have no way of finding out the names of the songs I dont know. Like that first song! What IS that?!

And this.

Feed your black crusty soul with Hagen Daaz this Valentines day

Online grocery delivery service FreshDirect is keeping up the long time honored tradition of cashing in on the miserable and date-less this Valentine's Day. Sound like your kinda gig?

From their website:

"Is Valentine's Day simply a stinging reminder of singlehood, like a coarse-grained sea salt rubbed into your painful, wounded heart? We've got a few ideas on how to ease the suffering. Just check out this handy selection of our favorite items for the brokenhearted. From bitters (to match your mood) to thyme (said to heal all wounds) these items might just cushion the bumpy trip from your blind denial all the way to newfound acceptance of single life."

Why is everyone in America overweight?

They have the foods sorted into different catagories, like denial, anger, depression, and finally, acceptance. Still interested? Get on over to http://www.freshdirect.com/category.jsp?catId=picks_broken&trk=picks and eat your heart out. Your grayish-bluish moldy heart of MISERY!

Oh, come on, lighten up.

Show Your Bones

For the thousands of Sonic Youth junkies who read this:


While you take all that in, um, the Yeah Yeah Yeahs are coming out with a new cd, called Show Your Bones. They made up this whole elaborate lie earlier in the year and said the new album was going to be about the life of Karen O's cat, Coco, and probably include a lot of folk influences. I held back a few tears. The real deal hype machine is in full effect now, though, and the new album is cat-less and hopefully folk-less too. I loved Fever to Tell.

Karen O: "Show Your Bones is what happens when you put your finger in a light socket. Maybe there is some of that electric current flowing through the tracks of our album illuminating us from the inside out for you to laugh at and cry to or fry to. Or not.” Deep.

I just heard the single, Gold Lion, and shit. It's definately fleshed out. The YYY's recorded their last album in a wet paper bag in somewhere in Brooklyn. And by the sounds of this, they got themselves a big chunk of glossy LA studio.

Karen O's vocal are helium-ized, and almost unrecognizably banal. The only thing YYY about them are the 'ooh-ooh' screeched choruses. The song is good, sure, but the jazzed up production kinda ruins it for me, because what I loved so much about Fever to Tell was the cacophonic urgency the ridiculous sparseness gave it. The glass-half-empty part of my brain wants to think this will end up in a Target commercial. Plus the beginning sounds like the steaming pile of unadultered shit that is that Weezer song, Beverly Hills.

witness: http://s62.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=14I7B5573BB4O1E4MON0AJITUS